First Things First - Know Thyself

This week we are looking at how knowing and expressing what we need helps us connect with the people we love and those whom we are called to serve. Jane lost two sisters to Cystic Fibrosis. She was the strong one….after all, she survived. Being needy did not feel safe. But, that self-sufficiency was an illusion, a counterfeit which led to a place of despair. Only when she began to believe that God values our neediness did she take steps of faith to open up her heart to connecting.

Within the Trinity God (plural) is always attached, inter-dependent, never in isolation. At the same time, God (plural) is individual. Eternally connected. Ever separate. God is self-sufficient. We are not. As image bearers, we are created to reach outside ourselves to get what we need. One of the most spiritual activities we can perform is to need other people.

Asking for help and support is inconvenient and uncomfortable. Sometimes it is unsafe. Many of us have been taught that it is selfish. Yet God built dependency into all of us. Needs, often experienced as feelings, were there even before the Fall. Emotions can tell us when a need is not being met.

What might you need? Some examples:
Support in uncertainty, a transition, or tough decision
Comfort in a loss or disappointment
Acceptance and understanding
A hug
To express your feelings without being criticized or made fun of
To be affirmed for who you are, not just what you do

Action steps: Am I asking for what I need?
Am I being specific / clear?
Was I honest?
Was I willing to take a risk?

Maturity is the result of resolving the unmet needs in a relationship.Cloud &Townsend